I'm not a big fan of Paris Hilton for lots of reasons. She's not all that nice, she's not at all talented, she's really kinda rude, and she hasn't much of a brain. But the BIGGEST reason I'm not a big fan of Paris Hilton is because she disproves Einsteins's Theory of Relativity.

See, in order for Einestein's theory or Relativity to be valid, time pretty much has to be a linear dimension. In a linear dimension, the concept of Causality is sacrosanct- cause always comes before effect. For example, you have to get hit on the head by a rock in order to feel it. You have to put water in sub-zero temperatures in order to freeze it, and you have to put a cake in the oven in order to cook it.

Paris Hilton violates this logic. She was famous before she did anything to be famous for. This is putting the cart before the horse, the effect before the cause.  I can just feel Einstein spinning in his grave.

Paris Hilton is UnNatural.